Happy Birthday King Harald V of Norway! Yay, I guess. I have a hard time faking excitement and celebrating the birthday of a 75 year old man who was born a Prince and became King of Norway in 1991. The most hardship this man has seen was estate hopping as a small child, during WWII, from one royal's home to another. Total bummer, dude. I'm sure he's not a bad guy but...ahh fuck it. Maybe I'll have a piece of seafood and raid a local village in good viking tradition. Moving on.
Happy International Mother Language Day! This day was proclaimed by UNESCO in November 1999, "to promote the preservation and protection of all languages used by peoples of the world" and has been celebrated every February 21 since 2000. Now, I'm wondering, do I just speak English today? That is my native tongue and I'd be saving everyone a lot of unnecessary auditory distress by not attempting to speak Italian or Hungarian. But I should take a step back and quit being a rude fucker for a couple seconds and let you know the important history behind this holiday. This day was chosen to represent the day in 1952 when students in then Pakistan were demonstrating for recognition of their language, Bangla, to be a national language and were shot and killed by police in Dhaka. (Which is now the capital of Bangladesh.) No one should ever be persecuted for speaking their native language in their native land. Look at that. I was serious for a whole few sentences. Now get out there, speak in your mother language, and let's get this diversity train rolling. Lépjünk tovább.
It's Mardi Gras! Fat Tuesday! Shrove Tuesday! Throw beads at chicks and see their boobs Tuesday! Drink too much, piss your pants, and pass out in a trash can Tuesday! Whatever you choose to call, it's time to partay! Well, if you can. For most people it's go to work or school, come home exhausted, and pass out on the couch with a beer in your hand. If you have been looking forward to today so you can go out and get "wasted" than you are probably one of those people with a Fb profile photo of you at the "club". You're probably wearing a $70 Affliction t-shirt and $5 sweat pants right now, with a half faded X on your hand from some bar last night, and a fresh prescription for Valtrex in your pocket. You, my friend, are a true champion and don't even get me started on bar chicks. But I guess today is your day, champ, to go out and pick up another DUI while trying to get your whistle wet from that 3 who lives in Espanola. Remember to party it up today, champ, because tomorrow is Ash Wednesday, the beginning of Lent, and that gold cross you always wear (even in the shower) does have meaning to it and tomorrow you must REPENT! (I am one sour S.O.B.) However you choose to celebrate your Fat Tuesday just please be safe and responsible and remember it only takes two minus a condom to make a baby. Cheers!
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